I don’t think.

I don’t think I’ll ever beable to make it as a psychiatrist. I don’t think I’ll ever beable to help anyone ever again. I don’t think I have the right to. I don’t think that I should. I giving up the dream. I’d do something more or less generic to my asian background and make use of myself however I’d be able to, no matter how useless I am. I dig huge ass fucking unescapeable holes for myself, and I think being a psychiatrist would make the people I help dig bigger and more unescapable holes for themselves. goodbye dream

5:oopm: having asked about 5 people, whether i actually helped or not, I have found my self in the same position I’d been in this morning. Goodbye dream, I think it would do me good to stop diggging holes by doing what i do.

11pm: I’m going to chuck a helen and decide i have no idea what i want to be now. anyways for purpose of enjoyment, enjoy this rather sick but funny video of whack a kitty

Garlic Chicken Crackles (cooking)

karen: sharing stuff is a good thing. sometimes i wish peopel would tell me if im being a bitch or not. it gets me all paranoid cuz im so mean no a days i just got called a stalker and obsessed becuase of the walky talky and how we just go earvdrops on the guys rooms LOOL to research what they talk about.

Check List for Camp:

1. DS (has yet to convince sister)
2. 2 cans of korean coffee
3. 3 can of assorted random drinks
4. 1 bottle of water
5. Cup noodles
6. Up and Go
7. Food
8. Clothing
9. Resunc ipod with NEW songs that I seriously won’t get bored of
10. Chargers – For phone and DS
11. Handwash that doesn’t need water
12. Plastic cups, forks, knives and cups etc
13. TOILETRIES – Toothbrush, toothpaste, facewash? (someone will bring one I’m sure, we all borrow), moisturiser
14. Sleeping bag + pillow/blanket
15. Torch
16. Garbage bags
17. Camera
18. Sleeping jumper
19. walky talky if we find one. omg 2 more days WE NEED TO FIND A WALKY TALKY
20. almost forgot: STOCK UP ONE COLD MEDICINE AND PANADOL
21. SHOES.

Im done

As you see, I still have a lot of things to organise. I’m fucking doomed. What else has everyone else done?

someone tell me if I need more clothes

I have 1 jacket, 1 tshirt, 2 shirts with mid sleeves, my PJs and 1 pair of jeans. DO I NEED MORE?

Oh wtf.

I talk about feeling this and feeling that because people have done this and that to me, but come to think of it, I may have done the exact same thing to people.

I’m sorry. I’m sorry if I have been a bitch to anyone or made anyone think as much as I have thought about some things.

Now I come to understand that we may have certain motives behind how we act. Well in my cases anyway. But come to think of it, what is hurtful is that the person on the receiving end rarely understands or knows of your motives. And it is definitely unnatural to inform them of your motives. So, in the end GG.

Anyways, I don’t know what I’m talking about. But I have also realised that your friends help you learn a lot about yourself. They point out traits that you would’ve otherwise not realised you possess and you start to think about whether it’s a correct observation.

Should be doing biology. -_- HF AT CAMP KIDDOS <3!

Carbonara + mince meat (and alot of other random herbs/taste adjustment stuff)

I think I’m just being stupid and over thinking about the outcomes of life and everything in between.

eyecandy: My Desktop of the day as imspired by Helenearcandy: carpe diem – Yellow Generation

I think I am going to keep up with this ‘title’ naming thing where all my titles are named after what I ate at the time of posting the post. Makes me feel diverse I do not remember what the point of posting this post was after reading Helens blog. That was one of the longest entries she has ever written and it makes me happt to be able to read it HEHE. You can just see it if you look closely at the IE window behind the one at the front that says AnimeVice. Oh how sad my life is to resort to the world of cyberspace =P The lack of updates today on Twitter scares me :O there usually are like a billion or something when I get on but since the afternoon there has only been like two from jessica and Jenny (and they both start with J).

Camp is coming up and being as organised as I am, I went shopping for camp supplies today. And guess what I came back with… 6pack up and go, and a small bottle of moisturiser/vaseline. I fail at this shit. Btw does anyone know, DO WE NEED SWIMMING COSTUMES D:

Check List for Camp:

1. DS (has yet to convince sister)
2. 2 cans of korean coffee
3. 3 can of assorted random drinks
4. 1 bottle of water
5. Cup noodles
6. Up and Go
7. Food
8. Clothing
9. Resunc ipod with NEW songs that I seriously won’t get bored of
10. Chargers – For phone and DS
11. Handwash that doesn’t need water
12. Plastic cups, forks, knives and cups etc
13. TOILETRIES – Toothbrush, toothpaste, facewash? (someone will bring one I’m sure, we all borrow), moisturiser
14. Sleeping bag + pillow/blanket
15. Torch
16. Garbage bags
17. Camera
18. Sleeping jumper
19. walky talky if we find one. omg 2 more days WE NEED TO FIND A WALKY TALKY
20. almost forgot: STOCK UP ONE COLD MEDICINE AND PANADOL

As you see, I still have a lot of things to organise. I’m fucking doomed. What else has everyone else done?

edit edit:

 Having finished Lucky Star recently, I get that it relies a bit on moe to carry it, but moe for what? Lucky Star offers a lot of things to go moe on, cute girls for one, that’s pretty standard, otakuisms for another (are those not cute and inept too?). For me in particular, Lucky Star left me “moe” for school life and hanging out. Miss that sometimes. These days, hanging out needs to be planned; it isn’t organic anymore. I miss that and that’s something which is lost once those days are over — if it’s not work, it’s kids.

I want to stay in school forever. Also, I suddenly got turned off having kids. kind of. ewwwwww

edit edit edit: I will provide a photo gallery of my packing for camp and all over the next few days just becuase im that bored and I wnat to get use to the camer yay estimated 1500 picture can be taken with the 4gb car.d HOPEFULLY. First picture up will be either Monday or tmro. OMG 2 MORE DAYS TO CAMP WOOT THE FUCKER

Hyper

Why bother when clearly you’re not getting the same level of effort back?

I’m happy.

And I don’t believe you need a heard of friends, only a handful of good ones. The ones that grow up alongside you, that you know will be there and won’t change despite external obstacles and changes which will and have occurred. The ones that make you feel like yourself, that let you be yourself. The ones who can tolerate you, even during the weirdest of phases.
Cheese much ?

You’re all beautiful people.